


I'd Do Everything For You (Except Break Up, Apparently)

by friendly father figure figment (hi_its_tutty)



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Bets, Break Up Talk, Coffee Shops, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluffy Ending, Logan Sanders Is Done, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Remus Sanders is Chaotic, Remus being Remus, a request to break up, but not really, talk of breaking up?, you'll see - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-31
Updated: 2019-07-31
Packaged: 2020-07-27 13:44:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 934
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20047012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hi_its_tutty/pseuds/friendly%20father%20figure%20figment
Summary: Logan thinks that his and Remus's pretend relationship has gone on far too long. Remus doesn't.





	I'd Do Everything For You (Except Break Up, Apparently)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kitkatzgr8](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kitkatzgr8/gifts).

> this was a crack fic that made me laugh way too much. just,,,,, enjoy. (also kitkat, thanks for coming along for the ride! you a real one B))

This entire situation was completely illogical, in Logan’s opinion. 

First, Remus had asked Logan to pretend that he was in a romantic relationship with Remus in order to win a bet with his brother, Roman. The bet was that whoever out of the two brothers entered a romantic relationship first would win. Logan, unfortunately, was brought into the situation when Remus decided he would cheat his way into winning the bet, and proposed a proposition to Logan. 

They would pretend to be in a romantic relationship for the duration of six months. This would include public displays of affection, including unprompted hugs, unprompted kisses on the cheek, prompted kisses on the mouth, a variety of nicknames, and flirting, both online and in person. It would also include quality time, including ‘dates’ in public places, such as coffee shops, restaurants, and other places of the like, a minimum of one night a week spent at the other’s apartment, along with an outing with at least one other person twice a month. After six months, Remus and Logan would stage a breakup, and the fake dating would cease. 

It had now been a year and a half since they started to fake date, and Remus and Logan had still not ‘broken up’ yet. 

“Remus,” Logan started, once they got settled on a ‘date’ at their local coffee shop. “It has been far longer than six months, I believe we should break up soon.” 

Simple. To the point. 

“Oh, _dear_, why so soon?” Remus replied, winking as he sipped his coffee. 

“Because, _love_, our agreement stated that we would break up after six months. It has been nearly three times that amount. This entire operation has gone on far enough, especially for an amount of money as small as 50 dollars,” Logan said, quiet enough so that no patrons of the coffee shop would hear. 

“Then why don’t _you_ break up with _me_?” Remus asked, his face showing that he just said something scandalous. 

Logan sighed. “Again, as I have said many times, our agreement stated that _you_ would initiate the breakup, in the case that Roman might figuratively ‘hold this over your head for the rest of your life’.” 

“Oh. Well then no, _darling_, I think I’ll refuse your oh-so-_wonderful_ request to break up. Thanks, have a nice day!” Remus said, a large grin on his face as he sipped his coffee. 

Logan rolled his eyes and sighed once more. “Remus. This has gone on far too long.” 

“Oh, hun, I think it’s only begun,” Remus said as he smirked, getting out of his chair and going on one knee, causing onlookers in the coffee shop to gasp. 

“What are you doing?” Logan asked, dreading whatever Remus planned to do. 

“Logan Croft,” Remus said, loudly enough so that everyone in the coffee shop could hear. “We have been together for a year and a half now, and I think that year and a half was the best of my entire life.” 

“It was all fake,” Logan muttered, not bothering to mask his face with a smile. 

“We have been through _so_ much together, and I think I can truly, and honestly say that I love you, and that I would do anything and _everything_ for you,” Remus said, ignoring Logan’s muttering. 

“Except break up with me, apparently,” Logan muttered again, this time forcing a small, extremely fake smile on his face. 

“Logan. Would you do me wonder honor,” Remus continued, bringing out a small velvet box. 

“Did you actually buy a ring for thi-” 

“...Make me the most _happiest_ man in the world, and marry me?” Remus said, his voice somehow louder than before, and opened the box to reveal a small ring that Logan _knew_ Remus bought at Wal-Mart. 

Logan debated his options. On one figurative hand, Logan could easily say no and not along with Remus’s terrible joke, thus disappointing everyone in this coffee shop, and making the patrons in the coffee shop (including the owners, who were staring at the two intently, having not only witnessed countless ‘dates’, but the start to this ‘relationship’ as well) very suspicious of why Logan would say no, considering that all they’ve seen was Remus and Logan act happily in love (which made Logan, honestly, want to gag). However, if he said yes, Logan would not only have to go along with this fake relationship longer, it would be harder to fake a breakup, considering Logan agreed to the proposal in the first place. 

However, Logan also had an agreement to think about. Yes, Remus had not done his part in breaking up with Logan at six months, but Logan was a man who followed rules. He was not going to break his agreement now, and while refusing a marriage proposal was not necessarily breaking up with Remus, refusing to, as many people would say, ‘take their relationship to the next level’ would be almost devastatingly similar. Much too similar for Logan’s comfort zone. 

“I suppose so,” Logan said, holding his hand out so Remus could place the ring on, causing everyone in the coffee shop to cheer and clap. 

“I hate you,” Logan muttered to Remus as he stood up and placed the ring on Logan’s left ring finger. 

“Now now, that’s no way to talk to your fiance,” Remus whispered back, winking. 

And a few years later, when Logan and Remus were _actually_ in a relationship and happily in love (which no longer made Logan want to gag), Logan would often look upon this moment and smile, then kiss his wonderful husband, completely unprompted.

**Author's Note:**

> i don't know why i wrote this, but i'm glad i did. hope yall liked it!!!! (and, if you want, leave a kudos and comment??? ;)) love yall <3333


End file.
